🧠 How to Cope With Decision Paralysis and Perfectionism

For Neurodivergent Minds (and Anyone Who Feels Stuck)

Does this sound familiar? You need to choose something—an outfit, a dinner plan, a new planner—and suddenly your brain freezes. Your heart races. Time stops. You stare into the void of “what if” and “not good enough” until you give up... or spiral.

That’s decision paralysis and perfectionism—two tricky, tangled challenges that affect many neurodivergent folks, especially those with ADHD, autism, anxiety, or trauma.

But the good news is: you’re not alone—and there are ways to cope.

🌀 Why It Happens

💭 1. Too Many Options = Cognitive Overload

The more choices, the more your brain has to process. For ADHD and autistic brains, this can quickly become overwhelming.

🧩 2. Fear of Getting It Wrong

Perfectionism often stems from rejection sensitivity, masking, or trauma. “What if I make the wrong choice?” feels like a threat, not just a worry.

⌛ 3. Executive Dysfunction

Even if you know what to do, initiating the action (starting) or sequencing steps (organizing) may feel impossible.

💡 How to Cope

✅ 1. Limit Your Choices

Narrow it down to two or three good-enough options. Use questions like:

• “Which one is easiest right now?”

• “Which one future-me will thank me for?”

  
  

⏳ 2. Use a Timer

Set a 3–5 minute timer to decide. Let the decision be "done" when the timer ends. Imperfect action is better than none.

🌈 3. Embrace "Good Enough"

Try saying:

“This is a choice that supports me—not a test I need to pass.”

Progress over perfection. Done is kinder than perfect.

📦 4. Create Routines That Remove the Need to Decide

Build habits and templates:

• Meal plans with set days (Taco Tuesday!)

• Capsule wardrobes

• Default “yes” or “no” responses to common requests

  
  

🧘 5. Regulate Before You Decide

If your nervous system is dysregulated, decisions feel 10x harder. Try a:

• Deep breathing exercise

• Weighted blanket moment

• Favorite stim toy

• Safe movement break (walk, stretch, pace)

  
  

🧠 6. Ask for Co-Deciders

You don’t have to choose alone. Ask someone to talk it through, give suggestions, or be a "decision buddy." Even if they don’t choose for you, being witnessed helps.

❤️ A Note for Perfectionists

Perfectionism isn’t about being “too picky.”It’s a survival strategy—a shield you built to feel safe, accepted, and in control.

You don’t have to let go of it all at once. Just loosen the grip, one choice at a time.

🌟 In Summary

You’re allowed to be a work in progress.You’re allowed to make decisions that aren’t perfect.You’re allowed to choose you—again and again.

You are doing better than you think. And you deserve softness, support, and self-trust as you grow.

Want more support like this?Follow the WeBe Sensory Blog – The Sensory Scoop for tools, stories, and sensory-friendly strategies for every kind of brain. 💜